I was sure that yesterday was going to be the last for
me. Funny thing, something happened that
worked in my favor (if you want to look at it that way), and it looks like I
have food for another couple of weeks. I
was surprised, but well, here I am. With
all that has been going on the past few years, I ask again, how is it that I
could have come all this way musically, only to end up doing nothing with
it? I know I wouldn’t be the only one in
history, but I still wonder. I wonder it
in a broad way, also, not just in one direction. I’ll have to explain that better – but another
time.
I’m still in the middle of working on my CD, I haven’t
had as much time as I would have liked, but I’m making progress. I don’t know what good it will do, the plan
it so present it to a particular record company, and any others that I may hear
about as I go. It stands to reason that
I’ll get more attention with a straight ahead country and bluegrass album. And I mean traditional, nothing progressive
or eclectic. I also played today at a
Wellness and Healing Expo at the Convention Center today, not a paying gig (I
really hate that word, but well…). I’ve
been doing those lately – back to square one – trying to get people to hear
me. 30 years of working my rear end off,
only to end up living like this – kinda turns my stomach. It’s not that it’s so horrible here, but I
should have some amount of financial freedom by now, and, I would think that my
hard work and abilities would pay off at least to some small degree. This is a nasty business – I often say I wish
I would have known that going in, but then I don’t know what I could have done
differently if I had. I do see, though,
some people doing their damnedest to fight Big Music and their bullshit, but I
know it will be a slow process. I’ve
already been seeing signs that Big Music is scared, they’re starting to fight extra
dirty against the little guys who are trying to gain recognition, and a
position in the business, not only for themselves, but for artists who have
been ignored and stifled, in spite of what abilities they may have. I’m staying as close to those people as I
can, and I’ve offered my help – whatever little help I may be.
So, things are touch and go, still not out of the woods,
as they say. All I can do is live day to
day. If it should ever happen that I get
a record label to sign me, or should I get on some kind of national tour of
small venues, great, but if not, well, then not.
You know what one of the things I would enjoy the most
should ever I get out of this poverty B.S. – it would be SO great to not have
to put up with people wagging their finger in my face, telling me what I should
and shouldn’t do – that would probably be the thing I would enjoy most. Second would be using my money for good –
while thumbing my nose at the money mongering investment crowd – nothing would
bring me more satisfaction than to tell those f’n parasites where to stick it.
All for now.
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